First of all, I would suggest to you if you are reading this that God has brought you to the right place, exactly where He wants you at this exact moment in time. If you are searching for help or counseling for your marriage because you’re in crisis or the Holy Spirit is leading you to build and strengthen your marriage, again you’re at the right spot.
Let me begin by explaining why we at Sweet and Sour Ministries call ourselves biblical marriage trainers and not counselors. Although there is nothing wrong with the word counselor. In my opinion, it has built up a negative connotation, in regards to helping with marriages. When things aren’t going well and a spouse suggests that they may need outside help, and uses the word “counseling” it can seem to have negative implication with it, almost like you’re a failure in your marriage, you’re unable to do it on your own and you need to bring in outside help. I think this is especially challenging to the ears of men.
That’s why we decided to replace the word counseling with training. I believe this is an appropriate biblical word according to scripture (2 Timothy 3:16 - 17). To my knowledge, none of us come into a marriage with experience being married. Most people didn’t have Christian parents in a perfect relationship as an example. Also, I do not remember being taught how to be a good Christian spouse, in grade school or high school, and to my knowledge colleges aren’t offering courses in this (there may be at some good Christian colleges, but I’m not aware them).
So the problem is, when we get married, we close our eyes hold our nose and jump in, we really don’t know what we’re getting into. We haven’t had proper training. How can you expect to be good at something that you haven’t been properly trained in? I certainly would not be expected to be good at speaking another language without having been taught it. However, the more I sought to learn and put in effort the better I would become at speaking the new language.
Let me give you another example because I think this is really important and I want to be clear. Your marriage will not get better by sitting around doing nothing. It won’t even stay as it is; it’s guaranteed to get worse. An athlete, let’s say a baseball player, will not become a better baseball player by sitting around doing nothing, in fact, he will become worse player. But an athlete who trains will become better, it’s that simple.
When it comes to our marriage try looking at it this way. When you were a child, do you remember trying to run up a pile of gravel or stone? As you ran up the pile and kept your legs churning slowly you went up, but when you stop you don’t just stay where you are, you quickly slide back. Marriage is a big pile of stone a mile high and I believe it is impossible to climb it in our own power. The good news is as professing Christians we do not have to solely rely on our own power but we are encouraged to call on our Omnipotent Father. (This is a big word that means “INFINITELY ALL – POWERFUL GOD”.) It requires effort and consistency on our part, nothing of value comes easy. Let’s be encouraged by God’s testimony in 2 Corinthians 12:9.
My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in your weakness.
Christ offers all the strength that you need. If you seek to train hard, God will change you and your marriage!
We believe at Sweet and Sour ministries that truth comes from God, through Christ, and the Word of God, as interpreted by the Holy Spirit, and when we are hurting in our marriages we can diminish the self-inflicted pain and suffering when we following His divine plan.
Our training focuses on relationships.
- First is our relationship with God, Jesus Christ, and the Holy Spirit.
- Next is the relationship with our spouse.
- And then the issues of concern.
- There is nothing secular about our approach.
All pain and suffering cannot be eliminated. It is part and parcel in this broken world we live in. Our training is practical, and you can implement it in your life, in your marriage, in your church, and in your community. Jesus taught that He came not to condemn the world but to save it (John 3:17). He wants to save not only our souls but also our marriages. Sweet and Sour Ministries is not here to condemn you but to encourage and help your marriage by applying truth taught in Scripture.
Caution: Biblical marriage training is truth expressed in love. We depend on God’s Word to supply this truth.
All Scripture is God breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteous living, so that the servant of God [and husband and wife] may be thoroughly equipped for every good work like marriage (2 Timothy 3:16 - 17).
Marital joy and strength require training. You can have a stronger marriage by applying biblical truth in your marriage. We don't ultimately rely on the skill of couples who come alongside to help struggling couples. Instead, these couples and trainers help you to experience the love of Jesus Christ through the Holy Spirit. If you put forth the effort consistently, you will be changed for the better, your marriage will be transformed and sinful, worldly, and satanic strongholds of the enemy will crumble.
The REAL marriage crisis
A real crisis is happening in marriages, like yours. This crisis certainly does not make the headlines in the media. Nor is it even mentioned in some churches. The secular media gloomily, but accurately forecasts that one out of every three American marriages will end in divorce. Worse, studies show that fewer people are getting married now and are choosing to cohabit without marriage. Studies also have demonstrated that couples who cohabit eventually break up. And after the breakup they are more at risk for depression, addiction to drugs and alcohol and suicide. Why? Because they did not follow the plan set forth by the One who created men and women for each other in marriage.
53% of very happy couples agree with the statement, "God is at the center of our marriage".
-- Feldhahn, Shaunti (Author)
It’s a fact then, that happy couples put God at the center of their marriage. But if your marriage is in crisis, God is reaching out to you now. He hates divorce, because He hates the sad consequences of divorce. The Lord wants to teach us how to turn around our failing marriages. We will not be taught how to be good Christian husbands and wives by the world. Far from it! Marriage is a sacred covenant, but the world treats marriage as disposable.
All marriages are under attack, especially Christian marriages, because the evil one wants to separate what God has joined together. The satanic enemy knows that by destroying your marriage, he can drive a wedge between you and God and between you and your spouse, all of which can leave detrimental effects on your children. According to some sources, Christians in America are no less likely to divorce than non-Christians. While this doesn't take into consideration those who live together outside of marriage, Christianity appears to offer little protection against the growing epidemic of divorce. “Satan prowls like a lion, seeking couples whom he can devour!” Too many couples don't even realize that they are in a fight, a spiritual battle.
For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms (Ephesians 6:12).
How can you win a fight, if you don't realize you're in one? Are you being trained for the fight? Our soldiers are trained in the military before being sent to war, and we as husbands and wives need to be trained to identify the real enemy (a little clue it's not your spouse). God has supplied a training program for marriage, clearly set forth in the Bible. He is the Author and Designer of marriage and it works best when we follow His way. This is easier said than done, but if we are in Christ there is HOPE!
You, dear children, are from God and have overcome them because the one who is in you is greater than the one who is in the world. 1 John 4:4
We want to help equip you to fight for your marriage and to win!
Our marriage training is FREE to all who need God's help! You pay nothing. This is due to Jesus’ instruction:
Freely you have received, freely give.(Matthew 10:8)
We received help (proper training) from Dr.Ron and Sue Sauer freely. They absolutely refused to take a penny when offered. Decades ago, their marriage was bad. But God healed it. So, they wanted only to help us.
At Sweet and Sour Ministries, our trainers are guided by the Holy Spirit and the Word of God. We focus on hurting couples (Christian and non-Christian) that want to strengthen their marriage. As said above, we accept no payment from you. Our training is FREE, so all can benefit from it. We don't want you to hesitate or have any reason to delay. We won't ask people in trouble for donations. We won't pressure you to contribute to this ministry. We rely entirely on God to provide for the needs His work.
We focus on marriages in crisis. If you're separated from your spouse or are planning to walk away from your marriage, we want to talk with you. Do you feel like your marriage is hopeless? We want to talk with you. Do you think you have found somebody else who understands you better? This is a lie straight from the enemy’s mouth. Don’t listen! We want to talk with you. Has your spouse left you? Are you hopelessly addicted to drugs, alcohol, pornography...? We want to talk with you. Our God is a mighty God, a God of miracles and of love. Surprise yourself. Surprise your spouse. Surprise everyone who knows you. Learn how God wants to heal you and your marriage.
Ministry of reconciliation
We believe that the best way to restore any marriage is to focus firstly on the restoration of your relationship with God through Christ. By focusing our training on reconciliation, marriages are saved. When there was no hope, Christ is the HOPE! Knowing Him heals us. Not only can marriages be saved and restored, it can be beyond any expectations that you might have ever dreamed. Your marriage will not get better by sitting around doing nothing. It won’t even stay as it is; it’s guaranteed to get worse. It requires effort and consistency on our part. But nothing of value comes easy. Let’s be encouraged by God’s testimony in 2 Corinthians 12:9.
My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in your weakness. (2 Cor. 12:9)
Christ offers all the strength that you need. If you train hard, God will change you and your marriage!
What SHOULD I do?
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